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Jim walked to the end of the block and turned

  • Jim walked to the end of the block and turned into the alley. He knew she was following him. He wanted her to. She'd been watching him for days. He went for his gun but she was

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  • too quick. She knocked the gun from his hand. He went for his camera next but that too was sent soaring. Jim panicked. Here he was, facing off a chupacabra. Who would believe him?

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  • The vampiric goat flew at him. "This is not what I meant by touring the authentic Mexican countryside," he thought. The chupacrabra froze in a tracter beam emitting from a space

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  • -time wormhole opened by George Lucas himself, thus turning it all into a lame flashy overrated Hollywood scene. The new digitally enhanced chupacabra

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  • leaped onto the set and devoured a bag of Cheeto's. Having eaten his fill of the cheesy snack he turned his attention to

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  • preparing chateaubriand for his three adorable Dachshunds, Fritz, Gritz, and Ritz.

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  • Too bad it gave them the shits. He made a mental note, as he dabbed doo from his fashionable white carpets, that feeding dogs people food was a bad idea. The dogs watched and

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  • giggled uncontrollably. "Look at this guy, thinking the food was the problem!" the dogs snickered. They hadn't told the man about the stash of weed they had found behind the

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  • Panties in the drawer. when he sniffs these, he will have anew experience. He can put the sex toys back and concentrate on these jewels

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  • yes these jewels in the crown of family jewels, and god knows his family needed all the jewela they could muster. he blamed the revolution for this predicament, bloody bolsheviks!!

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