One of the doctors who caught the end of

One of the doctors who caught the end of it said that he’d knocked down three of them before the last one hit him in the head with a brick.” “A brick!?” I yelped. The floodgates

flew open and I pissed myself. All the way to Denny's my shoes made that wet sneaker squeak. I had to keep going, I had a date. I'm really an IHOP guy but damn, it's

my birthday and I want that free meal. Much to my chagrin, I was offered a senior's menu. That really steamed my

broccholi. Fortunately, that particular veggie was on the senior menu. UNfortunately, everything on the senior's menu was sorely lacking in salt and spices of any kind except

cumin. For whatever reason, the old farts loved their cumin. Cumin here. Cumin there. Cumin, cumin, cumin.

I think it was because the heartburn gave them something to talk about. They could compare symptoms, and critique the effectiveness of Pepcid. Which they agreed was not as good as

the herbal remedy the old Native American woman suggested to them outside the local watering hole. If they were to get any kind of effectiveness, they had to act quickly because

the planetary alignment wouldn't last for much longer, and it had just reached its peak. We gathered herbs like herb gathering mad-men and concocted the Native American remedy just

as our ancestors had taught us. It was time to apply the remedy. We carefully approached the head of the creature and looking down saw

that he was all better now! What luck! Not wanting the bottle of cough syrup to go to waste, we decided to drink it just for giggles. And that's the exact moment I became a stoner.