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Dear Diary, I drew that "S" thing on Josh's

  • Dear Diary, I drew that "S" thing on Josh's hand today, but before 7th period, he'd washed it off. Hygiene is totes adorbs! I washed my Josh altar to honor his hygienic ways.

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  • I then bronzed Josh's lock of hair. Oh, diary, I look forward to sleeping in my "blind" right outside Josh's window so I can be near him. I did 10 Josh push-ups and licked the wrap

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  • ping paper which tasted strangely like bubble gum. When I was finished with my Josh push-ups, I got on my Josh computer and did some Josh web surfing, looking for Josh. I found tha

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  • t I had Josh OCD when I happened upon the Josh DSM-V. Reviewing this online Josh manual, I began believing I also had Josh schizotypal disorder, Josh trichotillomania, and Josh

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  • Plastophobia. Plastophobia was a new listing, in an era when fear of plastic and its chemical poisons was endemic. Everyday, someone had a seizure from toxic plastic added to their

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  • travel water bottles, their childrens' toys, their cheap pens and party favors. The 911 calls had blindsided health officials; over the course of a single week,

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  • plastic related deaths increased by 5,639%. It wasn't locally either. Reports came in from all across the world that something was going on that was causing plastic to kill people.

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  • Exhaustive investigations were conducted for no less than ten years without any leads into the murders. Then, one misty day in April of 1967, Ben Braddock learned about Plastics.

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  • The plastics were a notorious gang of android mobsters who had grudges against random people, or seemingly random. What Braddock learned was that the murders all had one connection

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  • He rushed off to tell the police what he learned. Unfortunately, a little over halfway to the station, the plastics caught up with him. And poor Braddock was never seen again.

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4 Comments

  1. PurpleProf Aug 21 2018 @ 22:55

    Love "The Graduate" reference, VG!

  2. ValkyrieGrrl Aug 21 2018 @ 23:43

    Thank you, PurpleProf..."are you trying to seduce me?" ;-)

  3. ValkyrieGrrl Aug 25 2018 @ 00:24

    (err...just want to clarify/make sure you know I was just throwing in another quote from "The Graduate"...in case you misunderstood and thought I was being flirty)...It was just a bad joke. ;-)

  4. LordVacuity Aug 25 2018 @ 00:37

    Should I bring the popcorn, Mr. Braddock?

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