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I burst through my own chest finally, but

  • I burst through my own chest finally, but not before I fell onto the table, scattering my friends' cell phones and entrees. I emerged refreshed, like a gelatinous, elegant phantasm

    4
  • . Pure ego, unfettered by a mortal coil, unharnessed from the drudgery of a body. I left my friends to their unlimited breadsticks and salad, ready to saturate the world with ME.

    5
  • My ineffable essence floated along happily infusing passers by with me-ness. Uh oh! Just spotted a Grand Vizier with a jewelled bottle & a crafty expression. Shazaam! I'm trapped

    3
  • by a rusty bear trap that just crushed my femur into agonizing shards. Damn that Mad Trapper! Where is that stupid genie, I don't want to waste my last wish but I need to

    4
  • Be vigilant with the radio and the channels I listen to. The BBC has several programmes that I love. Its the Queens English that I like to hear. Her Majesty loves to read and tell

    3
  • laconic tales of restless skanks who slink around like skunks or skinks. We've seen before how her libido is constantly affecting official government policy. Her parade of Royal Be

    3
  • -dwetters went down in history as the first annual parade that was cancelled before it began. The royals took their soiled mattresses and left in a huff, vowing to tax her for

    5
  • Every future breath she took. Seminal fluid on the mattresses began to fuse with the royal Crust and grow a hideously posh, deformed mattress creature. Philip tried to date it.

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  • The disgusting mattress creature whose origin shall go unnamed was a terrible conversationalist, speaking only in odiferous snarls which turned Philip's optimism off completely.

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  • Philip's psychiatrist blinked. "That's quite a story.Clearly you require the strongest medication available for your disorder. Here!" Relieved,Philip took the offered prescription.

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2 Comments

  1. BlastedHeath Oct 24 2019 @ 14:51

    When she was young the Queen's libido wished it could gambol at the Lido.

  2. LordVacuity Oct 25 2019 @ 13:39

    The Lido Shuffle is a gambol?

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