Dean Ackerman was head pollster for the Republicans.

Dean Ackerman was head pollster for the Republicans. He's seen monsters but not like this. This was Caligula all over again. He wanted the numbers. So Dean lied and told him that

he had a wide stance. His wife stood by his side as he answered questions from the podium. She smiled but inside she knew the truth. Her husband was...

a tap dancing fool in the crapper. The tapping and shuffling hearkened back to his youth in summer theatre. As fate would have it, it also helped him solicit gay sex in airports.

Learning to tap-dance and urinate in the urinal at the same time was time consuming and resulted in several pairs of shoes with salt peter stains one them. Being gay isn't easy any

where, but it was hardest in The Town That Hates the Scissor Sisters. Never did they feel like dancin', comfortably numb as they were. He'd fight fire with fire, vowing to

summon the unholy appendages of Sir Edward Scissorhands to combat the duo. Unfortunately to do such a terrible thing, he would first need to gather

2 giant scissor as his weapon and a giant tortoise shell as his armor. after he gather these item, Sir Edward Scissorhands is ready to fight the duo with his

imitation of Batman. The duo looked at Edward quizzically until they realized Edward was Joker. By then, it was too late, and the giant scissors had cut off their heads, so Alfred

, aware of his new duty, donned the Batsuit and became Old Batman. Equipped with state of the art technology, Alfred swore to destroy Metal Gears across Gotham City.

But it was too late. The bat mobile was broken. Bruce Wayne had left the building. Alfred heard his father's voice again, only this time, he could not respond.