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Humpback the Clown decide that maybe it was

  • Humpback the Clown decide that maybe it was time to reevaluate some of the voices he had made.

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  • Humpback the Clown played back his "voices" from his blackberry voice recorder. His heart broke. They were terrible, they were the same exact voice: Wolf Blitzer in different keys

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  • . He packed up his clown trunk and moved away from the circus. He would have to find other uses for his CNN voice talent and his Quasimodo back. Fortunately, a part just opened in

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  • the broadway revival of My Fair Lady, a re-imagining where society is filled with illiterate hunchbacks who try to bring Eliza Doolittle down to their level. He quickly auditioned.

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  • He got the starring role as "'unchback 'iggins" and was elated. He began practicing leaving the "h" off the start of every word & it became a habit. This proved to be disastrous

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  • when performing his duties as a waiter in his father's fine dining establishment. This role would bring him respect, he hoped, oblivious to signs pasted on his back every night by

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  • the sinister busboy, who also happened to be his half-brother. Of course, his wealthy father had kept his half-brother a secret from the world, because it would ruin his

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  • credibility as womaniser. His mistress, in her younger days had been attractive but unselective, now she had taken to overeating it was joked she was 'less of bike, more of a bus'.

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  • But he rode that bus to work and back. He ignored the stops and just kept riding, no matter how many others boarded. One day that bus ran out of fuel, so he found himself a new bus

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  • . "No, you can't get to heaven in a limousine, cuz God don't sell no gasoline," but you CAN get there on a dirty, old bus as long as you promise not to fuss. And he didn't. :-)

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3 Comments

  1. SlimWhitman Feb 07 2012 @ 17:11

    That bus metaphor went a long way... and I really dig this story.

  2. sundancer Feb 11 2012 @ 13:55

    I dig this story, too!

  3. SlimWhitman Mar 09 2012 @ 19:37

    Got dug by the powers that be. Thanks Vesp for a fold and pass one can only dream of. Definitely was a contender for fold of the month!

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