bunnycookies's photo
 

turds and no sense. No matter how sloppy it is, a glob of spit and some elbow grease'll pretty it up in no time. Hey, don't turn your nose up at me. Turd shining is honest work!

bunnycookies's photo
 

as the courtroom guard wrenched my arms behind my back and maced me. I screamed in agony. Despite my best efforts to wriggle free, his hands clamped down on me like a bear trap.

bunnycookies's photo
 

of us bathed in our misery? Wait, no, the poem isn't meant to have a depressing ending. I peered at the stanzas scribbled across the notebook, then tossed it into the fireplace.

eternity's photo
 

machine gun my way and gave me a dry look. "Nice try, kiddo. Pistol please." "Mom!" I stomped my foot and scowled. "Not fair! Why do you get all the cool guns?" Mom said, "Because

Woab's photo
 

some creepy guy with no pants opening his trenchcoat in my direction. In place of his naughty bits was a little gold pinwheel, which spun so violently that he was lifted into the

Woab's photo
 

"For your information: I love churros," Ayashikya spat back at me, "Here's a selfie of me eating one." She shoved her phone in my face and there she was, her face covered in crumbs

eternity's photo
 

form their own. The beans took the carrots' advice and made the Beans for Betterment Union. The onions thought the carrots and beans were being absurd. But they did make $0.90

ValkyrieGrrl's photo
 

"Good." The boss squawked back. "Now synchronize your watches and proceed with Operation Squirrel OverTake. Is that perfectly understood?" "Yes, sir!" they intoned simultaneously.

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firm. Little did the populace of today's niche serial killer fandom know, not only was Wayne a Dashing Slasher, but quite a Slosher - if you're familiar with pie-related fetishes

ValkyrieGrrl's photo
 

t in us had gone...washed away like so many Listerine dreams and marmalade skies. "Toast points." A voice intoned. "What?" Another voice was heard. "You meant marmalade and toast p