In late January I start planning for Dead President's day. By mid February its time to sharpen up the two axes. The invitation for this years seance attendies has been sent via Evite. No one RSVP'd except for the Ghost of President Chester Arthur. He replied with a "+1." His plus one was unexpected because Former President Arthur was accompanied by himself. This is not of note to those in the Cantorian Matrices but it is big news here in the colonies. In principle we knew it was only a matter of time before everyone in the Matrices would become fully aware of the level of deception this clone of Arthur has perpetuated during his impromptu moments in office. Clones meant DNA was useless, so Bubbalah Boychik, Jewish detective, was called in. He had to put the pieces together quick before Ramadan, Jesus' birthday in the Shinto calendar. As a Jewish detective, Bubbalah Boychik had access to several resources not available to Others. Like the Kabbalahic sciences. Clone DNA has a gematria value distinct from natural DNA. "Oye," muttered Boychik, "these are definitely polyester genes. Tacky." He pushed away from the microscope and peered out the window. The robots were zapping some poor schmuck dressed in clashing patterns. The 1984-esque fashion regime made sure the populace was well dressed, one way or another. The Emporer's new decree was that everything must be fashioned from spandex & polyester. Yes, the days of cotton & linen were gone forever, locked up somewhere within a cedar chest filled with mothballs.

 

Comments

1 MadWorld's photo

This is quite good, if I don’t say so, myself.

2 Woab's photo

Mad, you totally picked up on the polyester. Note how the story begins and ends in late January.

4 Woab's photo

I loved this because I had recently read The Yiddish Policeman’s Union by Michael Chabon.

5 Zetawilk's photo

I find that when an inexplicable phrase gets caught in your head from emphatically nowhere, the best way to chase it out is to use it somewhere, somehow.

6 Zetawilk's photo

Sometimes.

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