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I stood up. Then I lay down. I put my arms

  • I stood up. Then I lay down. I put my arms tight against my side...and started rolling. I rolled right out Paddywack's door, down the street, down the hill and finally home.

    5
  • Knickknack Paddywack's dog was still hankering for my bones. "Rats, if I wasn't an old man, I could stand up." The dog had no thumbs for me to pay knickknack on, so he tore into

    6
  • another bout of coma-like despair. The thumbless dog stared at the putrid sofa cushion thining, "Why, why why."

    5
  • Thumbless Dog had a really bad habit of using the bathroom, spilling beer that fermented, and other grotesque substances on the soft cushion. He was OCD, and started to have a coma

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  • The canine shrink, a black labrador named Dr. Sardonicus, spoke Doggish and had 12 dreams. Thumbless Dog was prescribed homeopathics and improved quickly to normal. His wife was

    4
  • a six-toed cat and spoke five languages, including Aleutian Minke Whale. Thumbless Dog and Marbles had seen Dr. Sardonicus in two of their dreams, even before couples counseling. C

    5
  • Thumbless Dog was opposable & Marbles had few but more than Thumbless.They spent their waking hour debating how to prevent Dr. Sardonicus from putting sixth sense into their dreams

    5
  • before it was too late, time being a numinous concern of theirs. Then like the opposite sides of a Möbius strip they came together with the same answer: Professer Loomis! Sardoni

    4
  • cally grinning from ear to ear like two crazy loons, they sidled up to the Professor. Each took an arm and picked his brain for information. "Hey! Looky here, Loomis!"

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  • "How do they make Jelly bellies taste like what they say they are?" They pried but, Loomis was an armored car, nothing got through and he smiled with sharp teeth. "ᴸᵒᵒᵐᶦˢ?"

    5

10 Comments

  1. LordVacuity May 26 2017 @ 12:28

    Actually you make them taste like that because they said that is what it was.

  2. Rebbie May 26 2017 @ 12:31

    Hahaha I thought you we gonna say because your super sniffer is so great. Smell is 90% of taste. But good one it's a mental trick.

  3. LordVacuity May 26 2017 @ 12:40

    Actually, I was going to say that but then I saw you were expecting me to say it and I had to fumble for another reason. I just couldn't bring myself to meet your expectation. It isn't personal; just my personal kink.

  4. LordVacuity May 26 2017 @ 12:48

    I wish I knew more about Dr. Sardonicus.

  5. LordVacuity May 26 2017 @ 12:57

    Found this for a Mr. Sardonicus: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._Sardonicus#/media/File:Sardgrin2.jpg

  6. LordVacuity May 26 2017 @ 13:00

    I listening to the 12 Dreams of Dr. Sardonicus on Spotify right now.

  7. Rebbie May 26 2017 @ 14:14

    Don't worry my expectations are not too high. Be yourself and smile now and then. Sharing happiness is the bomb!

  8. Rebbie May 26 2017 @ 14:16

    Holy Wow! That's quite an image. I about jumped out of my skin! Thanks I needed a good jump scare.

  9. BlastedHeath May 27 2017 @ 00:04

    "they spent their waking hour" HAHAHAH

  10. SlimWhitman May 27 2017 @ 02:23

    Thanks BH! I packed as many jokes as I could into that fold. That was the one I thought might get missed. ;-)

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