Richard Brandly Jr. barhopped for the last

Richard Brandly Jr. barhopped for the last 3 years. He'd visited the Icebar in Yukkasyarvi, the Faraday in Antarctica, the Baobab Tree Bar in South Africa, but his next destination

was the "White Spot tavern" on 111th Avenue East in Tacoma, Washington. All the hedonistic adventures in exotic world famous bars did not prepare him for the tavern with the burnt

cork bar or the picture of Ahab attacking Moby in harsh blacklight orange. The White Spot Tavern in Tacoma, WA was never in any Mobile Travel Guide. His eyes adjusted to the dim.

"Aye," greeted the old proprietor, a salty type with patches over both eyes. "What'll ya be havin'?" He dried an ornate stein with a towel before tossing it in the air behind him.

The stein shattered the window and Mr. Ed the servant had to clean up all 2,356,128 pieces. The talking horse grabbed the leaf blower and did it in 20 minutes, a record.

When Wilbur returned and saw that the window was broken and his stein was dented, he finally lost it. "That's it, Mr. Ed," he said, "I am putting you out to pasture!" Ed's eyes

welled up with tears & pitiful braying noises shook the house. Mr. Ed got on his knees, raised & clasped his forelegs, begging. "lf I expel him I'd have to kill myself," realized W

ilbur Wright inside the horse that used to be Mr. Ed, the custodian. Wilbur had been through this several times now. The newbies reacted badly and he had learned to wait for them

finish vomiting before continuing on with the presentation. This particular group however continued to upchuck until the class bell rang. "Don't forget your homework" Wilbur yelled

as the students exited the room. Wilbur sighed and slumped into his desk chair, gently massaging his temples. He opened his laptop and began composing an e-mail to the cleaners.