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Handyman's Pesto: Crush 10 garlic cloves

  • Handyman's Pesto: Crush 10 garlic cloves with a ballpein hammer. Chop one bunch parsley & nettlepatch with a weedwacker, add quart of sawdust & edible oil. Mince roast hayseeds &

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  • make an oil change from canola to peanut. I also recommend the Handsyman's Pesto: Just repeat instructions for the Handyman's Pesto, but replace all verbs with caressing. Impress

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  • your friends by making Handsyman's Pesto with fondled basil. If you are too busy, our Food Fondling service will pre-caress ingredients, massage your pine nuts and whisk oil to cal

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  • ifornia and back! Why just let us gingerly juggle your ginger or rub your big bristly bushel of rosemary. This Food Fondling service can

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  • attend to each and every spice in your pantry in under an hour. Why settle for discount food fondlers? We were the first and we are the worst -- in that inverted sense of "worst",

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  • so actually "good". That is what I meant to say originally of course, we are astounded photosynthesis and I encourage each and every one of you to try our original spice recipes.

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  • They are exclusively sold at whole foods market. Artisan spices are all organic and fair trade. Who needs anything else when we promote fair trade? John Mackey has tasted them all.

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  • Some even tasted him back. He reportedly tastes a lot like a John Mackey chicken if a chicken wanted to taste like John Mackey. John didn't mind the spice rubbing it in like that.

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  • It reminded him of that saucy wench that rubbed spicy oils on his back when he was in the war. What was her name? Tanya? And didn't she then try to fry him? John spat out his chick

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  • -fil-A Lemonade-Brined Fried Chicken Biscuit with Spicy Maple Syrup, a large hunk of which landed on the face of Tony "The Mooch"--soon to be indicted White House Leaker.

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