Beyonce's Nipples Costume Kicks Off Concert

Beyonce's Nipples Costume Kicks Off Concert Tour (PHOTOS). Brain Research, as Only Vegas Can. A reality TV Mars landing may be silly, but at least its on the right track. Alien

junk journalism at its best, thought the editor of The Martian Sun Times, Tharkas Zad. Why martians were so enamored by earthling celebrities, he'd never understand, but Tharkas

Zad had air conditioning bills to pay. If Mars was anything, Mars was extremely hot. Tharkas Zad supplied the gossip junkies what they wanted until he happened upon a real story.

Pure, uncut scandal. Turns out the King of Mars was an earthling with blue face paint. Tharkas Zad pumped up the A/C as he watched the king's head roll down Olympus Mons. Gravity?

"We don't need no stinking Gravity", they said as they shot their phasers erratically in the space station and flaunted their Gravity defying religion in our faces.

A bolt from one of the Anti-Gravity cultist's phasers seared its way through my best friend's face, leaving a melted, gaping hole clear through his head where his face once was.

He had a very thick skull, which somehow remained intact even though his entire face area was blown clear through by the Anti-Gravs. I knew I had to seek revenge on them and jumped

rope in time to Sylvester Stallone who was training hard for his upcoming bout with Clubber. When I felt my leg muscles had grown enough, I turned to face the nuke wielding aliens.

I saw the aliens had also been building their leg muscles. Mine were downright puny in comparison. However, I had bigger nukes, and I blew their alien asses to smithereens. Now the

World was free from those buggy-eyed, steroid-using, Martian bastards.; it truly was Independence Day. Things went back to normal: Trump called it his greatest accomplishment.