*deep breath* "Hi. My name's 49erFaithful and I'm a FoldingStory addict." *swallow* "It all started pretty normally. I found a link to the site and decided to try it just once. But "Nothing! boring!!" Chaz tilted back in his chair. Why did his wife force him to go to these FoldingStory Anonymous Meetings? It wasn't his problem, he could stop any time. At 4 AM , buddyboy (the 4,711th and only) realized he'd missed the FoldingStory Anonymous Meeting. "I wrote 70 folds today, at 30 words per fold," he mused. "That's more than a 2,000-word treatise on Zombinalia and I don't even feel guilty." Slim finally gave up after a week of cold turkey abstinence he'd agreed to at the last FA meeting after breaking out in Peanut M&Ms. "To hell with this -- let's fold!" said Slim. "I haven't hit rock bottom yet. Might have bounced off a few cliffs, but then my anti-gravity pogo stick broke down and now I can't do it anymore." I felt guilty. It was me that broke Slim's pogo stick, and now he's giving up. I had to come twenty times a month to reduce the rate of prostate cancer, or was it colon? I lamented my lack of health insurance, the lack of Slim's pogo stick, but most of all I missed having anything at all. I was a rare American. The few that actually had no possessions. They were all gone. No clothes, no gum. Nada. That's what happens when your credit score becomes an odd number. Luckily, I still had a job and thus an office to go to. And where there's an office, there usually is hot coffee, a roof over your head AND a computer, to hack into NATO's missile defence system. They will never know what a mistake they made letting me out of that institution... for the dead know nothing.

 

Comments

1 Chaz's photo

...and that is why it is so important to go to FSA meetings, it is a matter of national security.

2 49erFaithful's photo

Mustn’t fall off the wagon! ...but one little fold couldn’t hurt, right?... just to take the edge off.

3 SlimWhitman's photo

Clearly we didn’t really want to stay focussed on our fold addiction; meandering off topic is a great denial tactic, isn’t it?

4 49erFaithful's photo

Yes, but I do think it’s important to stay focused on recovery by ... LOOK, A GIANT WINGED NINJA WHO TIME TRAVELS THROUGH VORTEXES SOLVING MYSTERIES WEARING ONLY UNDERWEAR!!!

5 sundancer's photo

I missed the meeting too. :-)

6 BlastedHeath's photo

I tried to stay away, but somebody waved a finished story under my nose, and before I knew it I was back on the streets trying to score some folds.

7 buddyboy4711's photo

Yeah, y’all’re just a bunch of enablers.  ;-)

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