The old story forever new

The old story forever new

It was a wonderful Saturday morning. The sun was shining. The birds are singing. The trees are dancing. The flowers are swaying.

I was tempted to spend the Sabbath in nature, but I felt Jane would like to see my smiling face in Sabbath school.

I loved Jane. I couldn't stop thinking about her. She was so beautiful. Of course I would go to Sabbath school, just to see Jane's wonderful face. Little did I know that

Jane was a manikin. I didn't realize. I just thought she was a nice, quiet girl who listened well at Sabbath school. I asked her out, but she didn't answer. I took her hand.

She didn't take mine. I was devastated. I offered her two bites from my Klondike bar, but she just sat there. . .wooden. . .as cold as day old pizza. I decided, then and there,

that I was going to marry a living, breathing fat broad who was not afraid of a few stinkin' bites of ice cream, for the love o' Mike. I took the wooden lady and swung her around

While tightening the screws and then put her in the back seat of my car. Thieves thought better of attempting to carjack him. Mike accompanied her to the gym to work out.

At the gym Mike was known as The Guy with the Iron Maiden. She, of course, was the Iron Maiden. Why not? She was an iron maiden after all. When she was working out almost everyone

stopped to watch. That was against gym rules but when a trainer went to break it up, she too had to stand and watch the Iron Maiden working out. The spikes inside her were amazing.