Tonight we're rockin the house with a battle

Tonight we're rockin the house with a battle for the ages. NINJA POPE. NINJA TURTLE. its gonna be HUGE!

Well, that's what the TV advert said at least. I wasn't convinced it would be quite so huge a fight, but there was no doubt in my mind that Ninja Pope would tear shit up...

You see, the Ninja Pope was raised in the bloodiest of seminaries. He'd tatooed his whole body with the entire old testament. He'd been dragged by chains over the most

high places of honor. The Ninja Pope. His name would go down in history for reciting Psalms while single handedly fighting off Samuri Monks, leaping over raging rivers of blood,,

& challenging Beelzebub at the gates of the Underworld. Before the demon could unfurl his great batwings. Ninja Pope snared them in his iron rosary & impaled him with his crosier

. Beelzebub sneered as if to say, 'that all you got, you wussy ninja pope?' The ninja pope's eyes widened in terror; he'd used his last trump card, and was now left vulnerable to

harsh language. Beelzebub began to dance around Ninja Pope, taunting him with crude epithets. Ninja Pope cowered, crouching and sniffling, believing his end was near. But suddenly

and I do mean suddenly--suddenly is so overused, but keep in mind that this case calls for the word--suddenly Ninja Pope exploded into a fury of flying fists pummeling Beelzebub

into the literal oblivion. The Ninja Pope cackled and, with a final push, threw Beelzebub into the volcano. The Ninja Pope laughed, certain his enemy was done for, but little did h

e know that the volcano was Beelzebub's hot tub. "Come on in!" He screamed. "You'll lava it!" The earth shook & Ninja Pope tumbled in. AAAAAAHHHHHH! Plop.