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How are lucky are we that the Second Coming

  • How are lucky are we that the Second Coming is starting during a census year? The whore of Babylon has her G10 headed beast to ride upon. The McRib is here for a limited time only.

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  • My plan is to waltz into my local Micky D's and buy all of the McRibs they have, then stockpile them in my freezer. I'll make a killer profit once the first Horseman arrives.

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  • If that doesn't work, I could always make my own McRibs. Out of what you ask? Well obviously

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  • I couldn't just give away my secret recipe, now, could I? My last resort, my squid-infused McRibs, could be stolen at any moment! Can't go and lose that work of genius.

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  • So to distract attention from my Squid-infused McRibs recipe, I tweeted out a "leak" about my Rib-Infused McSquid recipe. It caught on like McNuggets on fire in the fryer! The pres

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  • ident demanded to know the secret recipe, in order to open up fast food restaurants in poor countries, as a front for secret military operations. I refused. The McRibs recipe was

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  • a treat, and I needed it to be able to infiltrate the Food Convention. I stole it and then

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  • Forcefed several thousand people scarab beatles. The scarabs forced their way out of the hosts and did a flying trapeze act with the assembled corpses. "My word." a monocled

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  • Mr. Peanut exulted, "I'm reborn!" He gasped as his shell rose from the pile of dead & performed a back somersault. Sadly, his top hat fell mid-flight & his hold on the trapeze bar

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  • slipped. He plunged downward, landing with a sickly “SPLAT!” The crowd forced itself to look then gathered around his corpse, spoons ready. Mr. Peanut had become Mr. Peanut Butter!

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