Sam the trunk murderer was asleep on the sofa one morning when his mom came downstairs. "Sam! Clean up this mess!" "Aw, but mom, it's ONLY A TORSO!" Mom was furious. "I'm sick of your excuses. Now put Benny back in the terrarium before the guests arive." "Yes Mother" said Sam. Unbeknownst to Mother Benny was Sam's means of removing the limbs of his vicitms. Sam adjusted the trap door in his room. When his Mother's guests arrived, he would invite a few of them to his room, pull the lever, and they would meet 'Benny.' Benny was Bernice Fluski, an HR Lady from Hell, Michigan. Sam had found her in the basement when he was 13. She had him sign a paper & got him on the payroll. She was a cannibal & hated receiving pointless complaints, that’s why she ate Maurice from marketing. They didn’t really like talking about the people that she ate, but that changed when a guard on gro up kitchen duty found her unwashed dishes, along with the final remains of Maurice's left leg in the staff room freezer. The guard panicked. If he confronted her about it, he'd be the next to lose a left leg, and he couldn't afford it since she'd all ready cut off his right one and crammed it behind the refrigerator where it was eaten by cats. So the guard decided to detain her to the government's high security asylum. Following this came the trial for the atrocious crime. The withered judge stated, "Amputations are charged with- ARMED robbery! " No one laughed. The judge adjusted his wig. Then he glanced over at her & saw...yes, it was a slight smile & gleam of amusement in her eyes. "NOT GUILTY!" She was hugged by everyone in the courtroom including the stenographer & janitor. Seizing the moment, she whipped out her tommy gun & robbed them at gunpoint. "No... not my wig too! Hey!"

 

Comments

1 PurpleProf's photo

Bernice Fluski! What a great name, Futique! I think “Benny” ought to live on in FoldingStory.

3 Gibber's photo

Armed robbery - I laughed, PurpleProf.

4 Gibber's photo

Lucielucie originated “ONLY A TORSO.”
http://foldingstory.com/ujmhe/tacu2b/
Since then there’s been over 20 “only a torso” folds.

5 SlimWhitman's photo

Yeah, I’ve got this one on my “recurring characters” list, though I guess that “meme” or “running gag” would fit better in this case. We’ve had a lot of fun with it. Thanks Lucieluce, I like your droll humor. Wasn’t the FRTWNGL bed another?

6 Gibber's photo

FRTWNGL bed: 4 stories.
Magic roundabout: 3 stories.

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