I ducked just in time. The neon pink paint

I ducked just in time. The neon pink paint ball which was clearly meant for me splattered right in Captain Spalding's face. He held his paintball gun over his head and yelled WAR!

It was utter chaos, every last human for themselves. I ducked and ran and fired at everyone I could see who was not on my team. There was paint everywhere. Captain Spalding glared

lovingly at last year's lasagna, before blowing it to bits with his high-powered rifle. Shredded pieces of pasta and sauce rained everywhere. It seemed that the carnage wasn't

limited to Italian dishes. Exotic cuisine from Armenia to Zaire was treated to the same violence. William S. Burroughs lowered his shotgun, aiming for a good ole American plate of

catfish stew. His appetite for strange words, cut and pasted, was why Michael Stipe had him sing "Star Me Kitten" in 1992. They had lunch together, and Michael Stipe ate veggie pie

with vegetarian pork rinds crumbled on the top. Michael Stipe just ate the pseudo pork rinds and didn't touch the pie, claiming that it smelled "meaty". His lunch partner stared

at the sheephead under the rinds. "Sheephead pie. just like me mammy used to make!" Sean slammed his head into the pie & tore at it with his gums. Michael Stipe looked on horrified

no longer since he had refound his religion. Turns out it was not in the corner but in his can of Orange Crush. Behind him Kate Pierson of the B52s was enjoying a Tin Roof sundae.

"Ah, rrrrusted!" Kate complained, throwing it into the bin. Michael Stipe glared at her for wasting food but kept being shiny and happy regardless. "Hey!" said Kate. "everybody hur

ry now! There's glitter on the mattress, glitter on the highway. Everybody's movin, everybody's groovin! At the LOVE SHACK, baby!" And they drove off in a car as big as a whale.