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By the time you have read this

  • By the time you have read this

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  • story, five valuable minutes of your life will have passed, that's 350 beats of your heart, and about three quintillion neuron firings. Assuming that you need 100 neuron firings to

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  • conjure up just one memory from early childhood, it seemed highly unlikely that anyone would be able to extract enough data to get as far as the teenage years - never mind all the

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  • extraneous experience cluttering the main memories. It can't be done!Slender fingers poised in mudras appeared in a burst of psychedelia, followed by a caped figure. "Dr Strange!"

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  • shouted a pair of lips that blossomed from the back of his scalp as sitar music played backwards in what seemed to be another room. He looked into the mirror and saw a strange face

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  • He saw SpongeBob in the mirror, The guy screamed in his underwear

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  • as his skin turned yellow and spongey. He called his dog to check if reality was correct, but no, the dog was a slug, and had a tag with the name "Gary." He decided to call his

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  • flim & flam guy, Morty Fishburger, to ask him for a private grift.That a decision had been made was good enough for him & he never did call Morty. So Morty never got to fleece the

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  • locals at the general store. Instead, Morty Fishburger took his 3 Card Monte swindle to a local nursing home & fleeced the staff out of all the adult diapers. When the supervisor

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  • heard about the swindle, she jacked Monty up and shook the diapers off him. Later we learned the supervisor had escaped from a mental institution and Monty Fishburger went to jail.

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