Vlastomil Keithley cringed when his early

Vlastomil Keithley cringed when his early paintings came up for auction. Even worse, someone was curating a retrospective of Vlastomil's "Huffy" and "Lame" period paintings. Psych

Teachers from around the world started snapping them up to buttress the validity of their study. Vlastomil Keithley hated that his work was a favorite of Psychologists. In fact the

next Psychologist he ran into was going to have his footprints all over their small intestines. "Take this, Sigmund FRAUD," he threatened to a 94-pound 63-year-old female therapist

Dr. Starling who'd seen it all. Another Lecter wannabee. She said, "Let's make a deal. I get you transferred to another institution and you tell me about your mother."

"Deal. My mother was actually a man - well, proto-Hominid, to be honest. Resurrected, genetic science." Starling looked upon me fondly, and I began to sweat. This wasn't the first

Time I had heard someone say this. And it was disturbing! Was this from Fukushima? After five years, it seemed to be the concensus.

But the Matter Shining Bishop said the glean didn't match the crime and the jury bought it. Nobody had bothered to ask for his credentials because "he's a Bishop". Fukushima fester

-ed like a gangrenous wound as the judge found the Matter Shining Bishop innocent on all counts. The crowd stood an applauded as the Bishop left the courtroom, but Fukushima sat in

radioactive dog shit and the entire courtroom had to be quarantined for seven weeks, naked, and without entertainment or air conditioning. Of course, they had an unending supply

of funyuns and whole milk. Have you ever tried to breathe next to a 300 lb lactose intolerant man in a space the size of an elevator? Life changing.