Her breath, smokey with condensation, cut

Her breath, smokey with condensation, cut through the air like

you would expect after eating so many garlic chips in under one minute. She asked me for gum and I gave her

an informational packet about the negative long-term effects of artificial sweeteners. Unamused, she decided to

go for the real stuff. She poured the simple syrup into her iced coffee, stirred in some milk and looked up to see

much to her chagrin also proceeded to stare at her boobs...or so she thought. Soon the man saw the T-Rex

approaching quickly, with its baby arms and razor-sharp teeth. However, it was distracted by the eyes of a bush baby, so

he tried looking up the ™ symbol on an ipad... He failed miserably!

"BOO-YAH"! said the homeless man as he passed. If only he could

see how I was really living. The lies, the deceit, he would probably stay in that dumpster.