He dropped into the backfield. Looking for receivers in the endzone. He pump faked, passed to the open receive. A wail erupted, the QB saw that he'd just thrown a baby as hard as he possibly could. Mothers were breathless and trying to get to the end-zone. Jumping over people, knocking down security guards and leaping towards the flying infant but a guy with a catchers mitt in the stands caught it. Never mind that it was a football stadium. He said, "This baby's mine." But the mothers all claimed it was theirs so the ref took the baby to an orphanage in Saskatchewan. On the way, many yellow unicorns were trying to eat the small child. The little girl was named Strength, but her personality was bad as fermented Baltic sea herring. It pleased her to see harm get to others and the girl often assisted so that it would. Not long after arriving at the orphanage in Saskatchewan The Baltic sea Herrings declared themselves free, took a bath in the rainwater, and flew off. Humans had no wings, so they could not follow. The health department visited annually. The humans felt the loss of the Baltic sea Herrings to their core. They worked on the human genome project in order to find the gene that would give humans back their wings. Ica -rus opened the last remaining jar of pickled herring and shook his head sadly as he ate the extinct fish. Icarus' genes were mapped, but these now included the herring's genes. “Something’s fishy around here…ME!” Icarus fell to the floor, legs now a tail, skin all scales. “Damn, I didn’t plan that well. I’m nowhere near water!” He flopped a bit then died. The moral of this tale is never swim up high too close to the sun and fly too deep in the sea. Or Icarus's fate will be your own and served with chips you'll be.

 

Comments

1 TarotGuy's photo

lucielucie: I wish I could like that ending more than one time!

2 SlimWhitman's photo

I just had chips a few days ago at a place near the London Ey claiming to serve the best fish & chips in the world. They tasted Iccy.

3 lucielucie's photo

Thanks TarotGuy!

Sorry about the fish n chips SW :(  But looking on the bright side, at least you weren’t exposed to a Russian nerve agent!

4 dimplesample's photo

I almost was but he was rushing and I didn’t have the nerve to slow him down. I didn’t use my agency.

5 SlimWhitman's photo

Actually LL, the fish n chips wasn’t at all bad - considering it was a touristy sort of place & the weather was cold but I’ll take that over a cold war climate.

6 lucielucie's photo

I know you’re trying to make me feel better, SW - but I’m just gutted that you had to replace your usual diet of fondu + rosti washed down with a pint of muesli for substandard fish n chips. Gutted.

7 dimplesample's photo

Stick a fork in this one, it’s done.

8 SlimWhitman's photo

Actually LL, we quaff muesli in “Stange” or “Stiefel” sizes, not pints, half pints and similar.

9 lucielucie's photo

Prost/sante/salute/etc!

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