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You see, I live in Derby. The infrastructure's

  • You see, I live in Derby. The infrastructure's a mess. They still use parking meters. And their town motto is: "Derby: I just don't know what went wrong!" Yeah. It's like that.

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  • and that's the way it is. I'm a huge fan of Run DMC. Which is why I live in a giant Adidas shoe.

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  • You might think it's weird to live in a giant shoe; but trust me, everything from Adidas is fashionable and hip. Hip like Run DMC, by the way. Continuing, this shoe is furnished

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  • with many children. So many that the previous owner didn't know what to do with them! If you don't like this home, I can show you a pumpkin for sell, it comes with a starving wid

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  • ow and a couple of savage children (and possibly a few unmarked graves). The pumpkin is considered a fixer upper. It apparently was once grand but it's past it's time."

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  • The pumpkin was pureed and made into a soup. It had no say in the matter. The savage children ate the soup without asking what it was. "Yummy", one little girl exclaimed to her mum

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  • ,who rolled her eyes inwardly,but there were enough pumpkin patch kids that noone noticed."Well as long as the remaining kids were happy & well nourished it's ok." She told herself

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  • stop pretending to care. She knew no one was being fooled. They could all see right through her like she was a fluted glass flower that needed the sunshine to penetrate her to find

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  • the dark corner where she kept her heart hidden. But she had built walls around herself, and a roof through which no light could penetrate. Only she could tear down this house

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  • of isolation, emotional torment & mental confusion. On the other hand, all it needed was landscaping with poison ivy & catbrier. Then she would finally have a home to be proud of.

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2 Comments

  1. SlimWhitman Aug 12 2017 @ 23:51

    I guess most of us live in a fixer upper...

  2. Woab Aug 13 2017 @ 13:19

    Every house is a fixer-upper, except the pumpkin houses, which are fixer-into-soupers.

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