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Ginger didn't fit in to the cogwheel community

  • Ginger didn't fit in to the cogwheel community of Meticulotopia, from her red locks & freckles to her bare feet. One day she stole a pony and rode to the land of floating hillocks

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  • but Ginger from Meticulotopia was too late. THE SHINING..ARMOR. Shining Armor vacationed with his wife Cadence to a Bangor, ME mansion with a huge hedge maze. "All hay & no clop

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  • " was what Ginger shouted. She made no sense. The rest of the office had decided that was the last time they let her speak at someone's birthday party. But it was Ginger's birthday

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  • too, so they went along with her claim that she was stuck on a deserted island with a skinny dude named Gilligan. They just thought Ginger was a crazy ol' lady, babbling on about

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  • their being on the island for years and how they had to resort to cannibalism before she was rescued by the Harlem Globetrotters. "May be a bag lady now, but I used to be a star!"

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  • She pushed her shopping cart to the side and snapped her fingers. "Watch this!" Her face tightened in concentration, and two minutes later the bag lady was a basketball. "Curly

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  • Of the three stooges couldn't have done it better!", the onlookers told me. I was not banned from whole foods for life, amazingly enough. Apparently the lady was arrested later.

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  • I repeated the stunt in a Trader Joe's, a Walmart, a Target, and a second Whole Foods. I was banned only from the Walmart! Two states have warrants out for my arrest, though,

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  • All I can do is try not to be caught. I'm still allowed in 48 states, but because of my little supermarket stunt, more states have become aware of my presence. 33 states now.

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  • The incident has changed me for the worse, both mentally and emotionally. Though I now have PTSD and still get flashbacks, I am learning to cope and be happy. But I never forget.

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