"What would you do if your son was at home on the bedroom floor, 'cause he's hungry and the only way to feed him is to sleep with a man for a little bit of money? And his daddy's nowhere in the picture?" "Well, I guess I'd have to do what you do," I replied to the legendary Skanky Sue of Route 66 fame. I was doing an ethnography on midwestern hookers. "How 's tricks?". Skany Sue laughed at my ignorance. "Here in Joplin we call 'em 'Bobby McGees' ". I jotted down the expression. "Oh, you wanna sketch my flowerpot? It'll cost ya." Skanky Sue reached into her patch and pulled out a hefty wad lint that gave me the distinct impression that bathing was not part of her routine. But this nasty knap has something s Acky in it. Its own sack was 300 years old. The ammo was kept in there. Skanky Sue and her husband were hunters of deer and lived off roadkill all winter. Venison stew was dinner.. Skanky Sue's husband was named Pericles Obaniopoluskeester. She's Mrs. Skanky Sue Obaniopoluskeester. She thinks it is strange that the wife doesn't have to use the Jr. The ammo wa wa gives the guns this strange kind of sound when they fire, but that's just the way Mrs. Skanky Sue Obaniopoluskeester likes it, so that's the way we do things around here. Mrs. Skanky Sue Obaniopoluskeester has rigged the bombs to sound like "Shaft Guitars", too. It is in this way that she guarantees that all wars sound like porn films in her country Of Estolithuania; denoting that whenever war starts, it’s best to use a little musical foreplay to move your foe into a “make love, not war!” ambiance. Either way, you’re screwed. Istvan Glazunov glared at me as if he was about to slap me or chop me into bits. Maybe he did neither for Tauri's sake. He left without a word, and to my regret, so did Tauri.



1 LordVacuity's photo

Pericles really changed Skanky Sue’s life.

2 PurpleProf's photo

Still, Skanky Sue was left holding her 300-year-old sack. Hoda and Kathy Lee should give her a makeover and a new lease on life.

3 PurpleProf's photo

Also, I am thinking this ethnography really could get published in some journal…somewhere. I’ve seen worse.

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