16

Anthropologists have found evidence which

  • Anthropologists have found evidence which proves ancient cultures used such bizarre materials as tree bark, paper and cloth as preventative measures against

    2
  • pregnancy. Presumably these were the palette, the media and the smock used to generate the necessary pornography to keep the

    1
  • cable companies in business. They had tried everything else. Creating different channels that weren't really different then charging for them. Basic cable has become a

    1
  • whore, selling its wares no matter how tired, for the highest price possible. Bertha V. Nation, the kindly neighborhood drag queen, was no whore, rather an artist with an extra

    1
  • personality or three, but we loved her for it. Sometimes she was a drag queen, sometimes a drag king, and sometimes a Boy Scout. Honestly, I'm not sure if Bertha is male or female.

    2
  • Either way, I am inexplicably attracted to this beast named Bertha. This is a cause of my tortured life. The drug abuse, prostitution, overeating, poor hygiene... All of it,

    2
  • every speck, making the money to help her pay for research into Obama's birthplace. He asked her if she wanted him to bring her a YooHoo, and she replied, "Kenya?"

    2
  • When he offered a sandwich, she asked, "Turkey?" But the lawyer didn't like Mr. Fogelberg, so he tried to Sudan. Instead

    1
  • of thinking about the trial, the whole court was wondering what it meant to "Sudan". Their question was soon answered when the lawyer began Sudan-ing in front of them.

    2
  • Sudan-ing, while no longer used by most attorneys, is still excepted in the trial courts. It is a method of confusing the jury, by using pig latin in their closing arguments.

    2

6 Comments

  1. BananaNut Feb 16 2011 @ 23:17

    I figured if OldestLiving could use "Kenya", I would be able to get away with "Sudan"... as in sue Dan... oh well, can't win 'em all

  2. RhettOracle Feb 17 2011 @ 06:36

    Can you hear my eyes rolling? :)

  3. LillyBB92 Feb 17 2011 @ 11:08

    I didn't catch on to "Sudan", sorry! I felt really dumb after.

  4. goldenshellz Feb 17 2011 @ 11:13

    I read it a few times after, and still don't now if I would have caught it. Oh well, we can sue dan next time... :-)

  5. BananaNut Feb 17 2011 @ 11:34

    Yeah, I knew it would be a stretch... oh well!

  6. goldenshellz Feb 17 2011 @ 15:19

    I just used the sue Dan, in a different thread. It wasn't over afterall. :-)

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!