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I looked tomy dock and thought that I saw Travis Mcgee and Myer sitt5ing topside of the "Busted Flush", but no. Travis and company were from the never were, and ravis and company
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were also from the never were, in that they never were, which means they could not have ever been from the never were, which was never the point. So anyway, a Hippo swallowed me.
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It was actually pretty nice in there. I set up a time share with Jed and Frank, a nice gay couple from Yorkshire. Sure the stomach acid got in the way every now and then, but
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as long as I didn't have to participate I could care less what they did during their time share. I reserved my times for the spring breaks and sought out the young college girls.
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But first things first, I had to pay a visit to the liquor store around the corner to make sure I had enough "liquid courage." My equation is simple, girls + booze =
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first base. girls + more booze + movie - halitosis = second base. girls + keys to dad's convertible + dental dam = third base and my equation for home base was girls +
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booze + a wedding ring, which I realize now was probably the worst way to score. Apparently when it goes that far, girls want something called "commitment" which I always thought
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meant a rubber room with a strait jacket. I found speed dating a bit puzzling. It took me a while to discover they were more than one woman. This would explain why
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there were 19 men speed-dating alongside me and only one woman. It all became clear when she leaned forward and, hoping for a glimpse of her rack, I stared down her shirt and saw
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a metal control panel. This woman was a robot, as suspected. Women have been extinct for five years now, but we all try and live our lives as normal. A tear rolled down my cheek.
Comments
What a twist ending! ;_;
By gbgbgbgb on April 25, 2011 @ 22:45
Indeed, the ending brought me to tears. Such raw emotion in only 180 characters.
By Bad. on April 25, 2011 @ 22:50
Had to resist the obvious, hilarious reading this back
By Sarimus on April 25, 2011 @ 22:55
“SO ANYWAY, a Hippo swallowed me.” - Somebody seems a little distracted. :)
By Chaz on April 25, 2011 @ 23:14
Haha, I’m just happy he worked off the opener that I didn’t wanna touch :P
By Bad. on April 25, 2011 @ 23:19
RE: Hippo, I was talking about the charcter, It’s a great line.
By Chaz on April 25, 2011 @ 23:37
He lulls you into never were land and then the Hippo just comes out of nowhere . Hilarious.
By SlimWhitman on April 26, 2011 @ 03:38
This is a truly amazing folding story. Well done everyone!
By sundancer on July 24, 2011 @ 21:50
The mother of all Hippo stories, and one of my all time favorites.
By SlimWhitman on July 25, 2011 @ 07:23
Hi all. I just did an undramatic reading of this story. Dunno if the link works, but my cosmic finger-crossing powers should swing the odds:
http://www.mediafire.com/listen/cznwiwnj8dg0y5b/TheMotherOfAllHippoStories.mp3
By buddyboy4711 on November 26, 2013 @ 20:11
buddyboy4711, I was sitting on the bus, and this guy sat right next to me, and began to tell this story… Great rendition!
By Chaz on November 26, 2013 @ 22:56
I just jumped on the bandwagon - here’s a reading of one my recent favorites. :) Linked from http://foldingstory.com/o151w/
By KieferSkunk on November 27, 2013 @ 00:42
...and just did another one here: http://foldingstory.com/fs9qm/ :)
By KieferSkunk on November 27, 2013 @ 00:56
...okay, I promise this is the last one for now: http://foldingstory.com/lz3aj/ (3)
By KieferSkunk on November 27, 2013 @ 01:10
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