Danny used a homemade pond life viewer made from a toilet roll with clear cellophane attached to the bottom with an elastic band, to examine the contents of his soup carefully. "Ah, there's a cube of fake chicken. And a pea! Look, a PEA!" Danny's pushed his soup view deeper into the bowl. "GAH! Looks like a pubic hair." Danny looked up at me accusingly. "No there isn't. Let me see that." I took the bowl from Danny and looked into it... What? The soup bowl was deeper on the inside than on the outside... There was a whole ecosystem beneath the swirling mists. I leaned over the bowl to get a closer look & slipped into the primordial soup. It was a hot, murky broth, with little bits floating everywhere. I heard schools of primitive cubed carrots croaking as they swam through the gently waving forests of primal noodles. Meat-like organisms prowled the silty bottom. I swam to the surface to fill my lungs with the buillion-scented steam before plunging back down between two primeval potato wedges who (thankfully) had just made a kill. I could see the spinach in their reverie, having just oiled a mushroom to death. I was suddenly aware of the potential among my vegetable friends. We were not just food for thought, we were an army! And so began The Carrot Crusade. Carrots did make up the early majority of the army that was mustered just outside Orleans. It was also true that a young carrot named Steo set it in motion, but the Carrot Crusade faced defeat when a giant Bugs Bunny appeared. Plucking a screaming carrot soldier, Bugs munched him casually. “What’s Up Doc?” he bellowed, chewing. The army General had no other choice. "Execute order FD." "But sir --" "YOU HEARD ME!" Over a distant hill, the words of a enormous beast echoed out... "Kill the wabbit, kill the wabbit!"



1 Woab's photo

Amazing, and surprisingly coherent!

2 inatick's photo

A quality read involving drama and intrigue. I would love to see this animated.

3 lucielucie's photo

A lovely ode to soup!  Long overdue imho.

4 LordVacuity's photo

I hope the beast stopped off at the Barber of Seville first.


5 LordVacuity's photo

Then that will segue into the Hassenpfeffer episode. Is Hassenpfeffer a soup?

6 LordVacuity's photo

It is not but it looks delicious.

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