Slippery bells with crimson waves make wanton

This, and many other hits can be yours if you just order now for Ktel's "Emo Sounds of the Millinium!" Who can forget, "Sands of my soul make paths in the loam." or "Rain...huh"

or "That cat leaves a present in my zen garden" or "If 1000 Emo's suffer in silence, would anyone hear it?" or "If I sing too off key am I on key?". Act now & get Lawrence Welk's

collection of used Kleenex, free with your purchase, if you're caller number 12! The phone boards lit up like a reindeer's respiratory protuberance. A blue-haired riveter from Iowa

named Rosie was the lucky caller. She was an ex-clean Kleenex collector because "men hadn't done it yet." But when the elves flew the ABC (already booger crusted) tissues to her,

the elves couldn't bring the ABC package to her because it was overweight. The elves didn't have the extra dough needed. To make cash quick

they decided to sell their bodies, forgetting that a body is a handy commodity in this material world. Now they had nothing to hold their dough with. The elves convened to solve

what is now known as "The Keebler Dilemma." Ernest J. Keebler facilitated the meeting. "We must find a way to make our cookies without our hands. Any suggestions?" E. L. Fudge said

"Let's manufacture robots to make cookies with *their* hands!" The elves rioted, kicking Keebler & E.L. Fudge in the shins, biting their ankles and clubbing them with wooden spoons

until they begged for help. Then the elves clambered up Elrond and Legolas and skeletonized them like piranha. The robots protested not being created and all hell broke loose.