Don't you hate when you slip on a banana

you were playing Mario Kart 64 with 3 other friends. You practically slipped on every single banana peel. You always got in last place, and after every game you

sang, "God loves a terrier," from Best In Show. Because that's what you do after every game of Mario Kart 64. No one understands the connection. You are used to this because

your brain is like a connect-the-dots with a few numbers missing. Maybe it is your obsession with Jane Lynch before she made it big or your love of italian plumbers. Either way,

it tends to freak all of us out. Maybe it is that whole goat thing. I don't know. I just know

that when I see a man with square pupils & a little goatie who speaks with mehh.. in his voice I'm outta there! But for many years I didn't see him & almost forgot. Then I attended

the Summer Sun Festival, in which our deified monarch raises the very sun much to our glee. There, the goat was waiting for me, but neither of us could stay up until dawn. A mutual

agreement among the Ancients had insured that the Ill-Chosen Ones would be stuporous by dawn's early light. Had they forseen the practical jokes crafted by the Unchosen, perhaps

in their attempt to exact revenge on everyone who'd ever overlooked them, all those who neglected them in gym class, see through them & ignored them totally? Yes, The Unchosen were

going to have their day in the sun! However, The Chosen ignored them as usual while being admired, having great sex & possessing soft, manageable hair. I'm not bitter. Not at all.