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"INCOMING!"

  • "INCOMING!"

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  • QUICK! To the shelter! Do you have everything? Ammo, Batteries, Water, Sudoku, Blankets, Gallon Drums of Mayo, Can Opener. HURRY! NO TIME! CLOSE THE VAULT!

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  • With that, the city evacuated into the enormous shelter. Fortunately, only one of the giant mayonnaise jars spilled, but thanks to clumsy trooper Steve, much of the ammunition was

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  • stored with the mayonnaise, and Steve's little mishap caused the jar to fall square on a box of shooting caps. The minor explosion caused a shower of mayo to rain on the citizens

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  • "Stevie, goddamnit!" Mrs. Fisher yelled, "Now we have to save the city of Rooster from all the mayo!" She took her purple cape and ran into the saucy crowd. Steve threw a fit.

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  • Then he threw a crossfit, but to no avail. Steve watched helplessly as Mrs. Fisher's purple cape started to sink into the flood of mayo that had flooded the city of Rooster. He

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  • lunged and lunged, stoking his metabolic superpowers. Grasping his superheroine partner by the leotard, he deadlifted Fisher out of the tide of mayonnaise with a schlorp. "One!"

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  • The jar of mayonnaise was homemade by Mme. Manatee for her husband, Det. Manatee. Being a Ball Jar, the seal wouldn't budge when the White Dragon Society threatened revolution. A

    1
  • local marketer felt that revolution marketing needed to throw the threat out and accentuate the promise. No Leopold, not the promise of raping & pillaging or a free workforce.

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  • Details at this point became murky. Subject I, reports that he saw only smoke and shadow. This has been corroborated by Subjects C & E. However, after the next word: Nothing

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