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Dairy products truly were the bane of Donna's

  • Dairy products truly were the bane of Donna's existence. She had been the daughter of a dairy farmer and now

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  • someone named Dairy Queen was threatening to overshadow her Cotillion. She was so angry her blood curdled. Donna set out to

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  • expose "her" for the deb drag queen that she was. Donna yanked Dairy's hair and tiara off her head, tore the scarf that hid her adam's apple, and took away her giant martini glass.

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  • "Oh have I waited for this day! I have waited for you my love, drag queen or no." With that, she donned Dairy's tiara, downed the martini

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  • and burst into an impromptu karaoke version of 'Are you lonesome tonight'. The audience loved it. She kicked off her shoes and started to

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  • smoke grass on stage as a tribute to Pantera. A hush fell over the audience and her heart began racing. She tried not to panic.

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  • Too late, she remembered, as the weed gave her the biggest case of the munchies she'd ever had. She jumped into the crowd searching for a bag of

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  • chocolate-frosted sugar bombs (which were actually pretty dull until you spooned some extra sugar on them). She settled for a custard-filled churro and large chocolate milk but

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  • as she had the first sip, she realised they'd added cinnamon...and her allergy kicked in bigtime. She felt her eyelids swelling, her throat closing and

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  • all she could think of was how she was going into anaphylactic shock because she just wanted to be accepted, be a part of the crowd, one of the people who knew what was going on.

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