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There was a time when dragons flew over this

  • There was a time when dragons flew over this village, unicorns grazed in the meadow, and Gods lived in the mountains. Now, those who are left have only the songs of

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  • the bards, recounting the deeds of heroes and mythical beasts. Even the great God of the Mountains has faded into the mists of memory. But the time has come when the dragons

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  • would write their tell-all memoirs. "How I Kept Knights from My Horde, and so can You!" was on the NY times list for 20 weeks. "Virgin Princesses, What's Up With That?" held the

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  • door open when there was nothing else to put in front of it. All of these books were starting to pile up. The office looked like an episode of Hoarders. Eventually,

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  • I read all the books and took them back to the library and cleaned the office to make it look nicer for company the next day. But they cancelled because

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  • CIA surveillance had closed the net and rounded up the stooges. We had to clear out. I shaved my head & donned the hare krishna robe and removed the grating from the air duct

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  • , made the sign of the cross, and crawled in. Two stories below, the head spook sniffed. She must have had the nose of a Doberman because she somehow could smell us through the air

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  • but unfortunately she had the eyes of a mole, so she was totally blind. No matter, because the Spook was led by a seeing eye doberman with stinger missiles attached to its

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  • nipples. "Live long and prosper," the blind Spook said, leading the mole mother from the bridge. They walked into the same wall repeatedly umpteen times until they were noticed

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  • and given sedatives. This starship ain't big enough for the bunch of us. That's ok, the blind doofs will soon be guest starring in the next away party. Phasers on stunned!

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