She elephants, that's what you'd call them.

by ramping across the grooves Knievel-style. It's the closest to airtime these she-elephants ever got, what fat fat fatties they were. It's a shame they held positive self-images.

It was this last thought of mine that caused God to throw me into stasis-detention. Frozen inside a cloud, I could only move my neck. God thundered in and looked at me with these

big blue marble crazy eyes. I defiantly looked into God's face, ready to argue. That's when I first noticed that God was cross-eyed!

"The worshiper is getting suspicious." The priest said looking through the spy holes. "Quick, get me the voice horn and turn on the smoke." (ahem,) "LO, PLACE THE OFFERING NOW!"

Samantha proceeded to place a glow in the dark tampon in the donation jar. These were limited edition tampons and worth more than any measly yacht! The priest got on his horse and

swallowed 1000mg of Viagra. Then the priest rode the horse HARD off of his yacht (his, not the horse's), across the Banana river, and down Boner Lane to Samantha's house, but

Samantha practised her magick, as did Tabitha. She spoke and a moat was created. The priest was stunned. Then a brush painted his yacht yellow and blue, the Swedish colours. Some

trick, eh? The priest got into his Swedish boat and Samantha wiggled her nose and the wind picked up and sailed the boat all the way to Cuba, where the air was thick with cigar

smoke and the sounds of the bunchers in the factories. The priest thought only of saving Sam's soul, but never saw her again after that day. Sam, ironically, joined a nunnery.