A cigarette for a thousand problems. #1 Death.

  • A cigarette for a thousand problems. #1 Death.

  • #2 - Life after Death. Do cigarettes exist in the afterlife? What a silly thing to wonder. Problems don't exist in the afterlife, so why would one need cigarettes there? Unless

  • spirits and angels smoke just to look cool, yeah I guess that could be the case. I bet Granma Cindy is puffing up a cuban right now. #3 - Meaning of life. Are humans being harveste

  • -d by the Celestial Combine? It was a question that naturally was brutal and circular. It was intended to unnerve any bush league demigod who tried to pull one over on me.

  • Stupidly, the demigod did try to pull a bush over me. He had run out of excuses. I ran the Celestial Combine over him, reaping and threshing him into a nicely shaped bale. Now

  • that the demigod was tightly compressed into nutrition for horses, I lit up a smoke and sat back, ignoring the demigod's vague wails of "My butt! It hurts!" The Celestial Combine

  • Harvester roamed across the bed sheets every night harvesting dreams and stealing blankets in the process. It was hard work but essential or the bed would be filled with overgrown

  • flesh mites. Flesh mites grow big on dreams but not blankets. Harvester claimed they did as an excuse to steal them. But nobody knows much about flesh mites so he

  • kept the flesh mites safe from those who might lack understanding, in blocks of dream-reactive gelatin that had congenial relations with the Aspic Communion and the Koi of distant

  • fish shaped candy.Listening to the sunset, whilst the rays of dawn echoed in his third eye,John knew he was no longer sane. But he couldn't care less,for the world was one with him



  1. BlastedHeath Dec 27 2012 @ 22:31

    I like that the narrator lights up a smoke in squalor's thread. Nice!

  2. PurpleProf Jan 17 2013 @ 22:00

    My face! It hurts! From laughing so hard...

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