This is worth it for the kitty attack.

"I can't tell if that's sexual or just cute, but okay," I said. The carny gave me a ticket and showed me to a secret back tent with a stage and raucous fans. Back-tent displays

are where its at at the carnival. Not every Carny will let a regular slob like me see what's in that back tent. But I'd brough a sixer of Miller and now, this Carney is leading me

through a maze of canvas, smelling intoxicatingly of elephant dung & cotton candy. It was soon pitch dark. I bumped into the Carney's back. "We've arrived," he said mysteriously &

really creepily. I felt dumb for accepting his invitation out here alone. His name was even Carney for gods sake. "Arrived where?" I mumbled, fear gripping my heart. "Your

crazy." "Yes, I am," replied Carney, his eyes whirling around like a carousel. He handed me a candy apple. "Look at this" He pulled back the tent flap to reveal a two-headed

snake, both heads hissing and spitting acid. "Wow!" I cried. "What other secrets does this circus hold?" "Oh mah boy," Carney said, "We haven't even scratched the surface."

...So that was it. He showed me around the big top, pointing out the five support beams and their pentagram-like shape. So that was how I ended up getting mixed up in summoning a

Lovecraftian squid god. I took the chalice of Yak's blood and placed it into the center of the pentacle, before returning to my corner and saying the magic words in Italian: "Zorp

con formaggio per favore squidino!" The pepper pot of doom rose and groundfairy dust all over the yaks blood transforming it into a white bunny. Somewhere I heard a squid snigger.