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One day a half crazy WOMAN with man hands

  • One day a half crazy WOMAN with man hands logged onto www.shrinkmyhands.com and was perplexed by something she read.

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  • The website was run by a group of amazonian headshrinkers who found it more profitable to shrink other parts of the body as well. In addition to head and hands, they could shrink

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  • livers and pancreases! It was sheer evil genius: shrink the liver - jaundice! Shrink the pancreas - diabetes! Slow deaths for EVERYONE who pissed him off. One small problem:

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  • his wife was waiting for him at the restaurant. If he missed his anniversary again, it would definitely be the end. He made a quick decision. He

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  • eased himself out of the bed, trying not to wake the long-legged beauty next to him. He gathered up his things and tiptoed out, not realizing he had left his

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  • Doritos in bed. I can't go back and wake the poor animal, i'll just have to suck it up and get a new

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  • comforter. Looking around disgustedly you know that the only place open at 3am is Walmart, at least

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  • they have the latest Martha Stewart collection. Maybe we'll make the People of WalMart website. Especially if we wear our favorite matching

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  • Sailor Moon costumes. We'd look so cute romping up and down the aisles of the food section or rolling around on the wheeled chairs from the office section.

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  • But in the end I knew that security would come and behead us for starting the French Revolution. I let myself be caught because that's what the heroes do in the movies.

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