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Flower 1 concluded, "She loves me"; Flower

  • Flower 1 concluded, "She loves me"; Flower 2 concluded, "She loves me not." It seems even the One Mind all flowers share is susceptible to doublethink. My dystopian flower garden

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  • was like Communist Russia. Flower 1 and Flower 2's separate conclusions were irrelevant. The State got to decide who loved whom. And in this case, the State decreed that there coul

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  • d be double-coupons for Snackwells on Tuesday. Putin loved so-called healthy cookies. That's why he had the courage to take his shirt off in public. He had Enteman's fatfree

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  • Cakes until Dr. Zhivago told him it was all chemical-laden crap. Then Putin ate oatmeal. The plain kind was his favourite and in fall 2016, he bought it in bulk. Obama indigestion,

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  • the threat of a global tea plague, and unrest over the leadership of the International Chess Federation simply amused Putin. He was not so easily provoked. But a malachite pendant

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  • worn by his grandmother in the late 1400's got his attention that's when he nuked the moon, with his famous quote "I love you America." Putin then decided to rip out his

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  • pancreas and throw it to the ghost of Tchaikovsky, who, as everyone knows, had by then become a werewolf. This made Tchaikovsky's ghost follow Putin everywhere and do tricks in the

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  • Duma like ripping off the opposition lawmakers pants when they weren't looking. Tchiakovsky was no sugar plum fairy but he felt awkward in his roll as Putin's chief state werewolf

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  • hunter. "Tough roll", quipped Gogol from inside the closet. "Who are you talking to Tchiakovsky, come here away from the closet", said Putin gesturing to somebody to investigate th

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  • e true identity of Jack The Ripper.How he could convey such complex orders through miming alone,and what became of the Investigation,still remains a mystery to this very day.

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