The cookie monster

drove a tanker truck that said "Cookers" which you could easily mistake for "Cookies" alas it just says "Cookers". The Cookie Monster collects cooking fat

so he could save them for a time of need, but was suddenly distracted by a giant flashing sign announcing

a sale on distractions for the ADHD-afflicted, mostly just more flashing signs. He approached the clerk. "Ma'am, how much for OOH PRETTY LIGHTS." She was tempted to cut the power

. "Sir?" "Huh? Oh how much for the pearls?""A single strand's 120. Is this to be a gift Sir?" she asked, seriously. Curious as to how often men bought themselves pearls here, he st

auched the bleeding under his jacket with Juicy Fruit gum and silly putty, careful to let no blood show to blow his cover. McGyver was pretending to be a pearl salesman so he could

expose a drug smuggling ring using pearls to launder their profits. McGyver's faux pearl specimens are ball bearings coated in Pearl drops tooth whitener. The drugboss suspects

it was an inside job so he went about lighting numerous fires to smoke out the rats. His Conciliare warned both against jumping to conclusions and especially against

rats. Because, his Conciliare explained, rats have rights too. The right to scamper around in the sun, eat crap & spread disease just like the rest of us. He slammed his fist down

, killing Ben and Willard in one fell swoop & by accident. The Conciliare was horrified. In his passion to defend their rights, he lost his two best friends. RATS!