"Finders reapers!" said Death the Horseman as he impaled another human. War the Horseman commented, "Tee-hee, you naughty thing. But do leave some reap-ees for us Three, will you?"

Sitting here eating a bowl of brown rice with no chicken I spot a fly.

Tired of that awkward silence and the mindlessness of it all, I decided to leave the room. Bad decision though: as I stepped outside all went dark and I couldn't see any longer.

As a weathergirl on a local TV station, Jenni was good. Really good. She could predict what the clouds would bring two whole weeks in advance. She once foretold that a shower of

Months past everyone learnt Dick Cheney orchestrated 9/11, had a puppet for president & killed his enemies in convenient "accidents". Less power than he bargained for. Who cared?

I guess I'm cranky because of my melting popsicle syndrome and the fact that it has rained every day and night for the past two freaking weeks! No wonder why my Anaconda is asleep!

On the part where it asked "How much of your day do you spend looking for components to tie into stories on FoldingStory.com? A) 90% B) 95% C) 99% D) 100%" I'd put:

I drove my Astin Martin on the wrong side of the beach. My shoes were long brown and shiny and I needed both hands to handle them. Women often ask me about my shoe size. Its 17 but

Vampires in Helsinki COME ALIVE!

The fidgety old miner clapped and rattled and said, "There's gold in them thar hills." He was pointing at my Aunt Shirley. The thing about the Miner and Aunt Shirley is

Before me on the desk was a rotary phone, an ink blotter, a rolodex and some carbon paper. Beads of sweat soaked my sun-burned pate. "Dammit! How do I work these things?"

Sylvia at last drifted in, maneuvering as close to Hemingway as she could with an oven about her head. Kurt rolled his eyes at both at them - I took at as a sign and started the m

Era una mañana de invierno fría, gris y cargada de añoranza. Llegué a la estación a las 8:30 y, como cada día, me senté frente al gran ventanal y observé el mundo exterior...

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It made me feel like dancing. It made me feel like "dirty" dancing. So I

Él no quería participar, hasta que...Habiá una vez, en un país muy lejano, un ciudadano que no quería particpar

And that's when it hit me- "All of these statues have penises...except this one!" I went over there to examine it more closely.

"How could she forget I was allergic to shellfish?" I thought- face swollen by the poisonous hors d'œuvres. "Is she TRYING to kill me?" And that's when I felt something poking

It was a world of anorexic topheavy nymphomaniacs and developmentally delayed overmuscled bullies. Luckily, I had a secret weapon. My mind. With just a twitch of

Why is it always everyone else going out for awesome bike rides, swimming in the moonlit ocean, having mind blowing sex on drugs I've never even heard of, and here I am, on my