San José is where the ugly people live.

The whole family had agreed, so here he was lying on a beach chair Christmas eve watching the surf come in on the beach. "I miss snow" he said. Strangely a moment later a snowflake

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OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL AM I EATING?! This. was. everything. wrong. about. Thistown. Thistown angered many men. They couldn't seem to make sense of all of these random changes. One

My left leg is larger than my right leg, and the left side of my face protrudes about half an inch further than the right side, which seems to sag a little. I'm an asymmetrical

The world was stunned to learn that, contrary to conventional wisdom, the majority of vegetables were sentient, intelligent creatures, and that, in fact, vegetarians were

Dear FS Family: We've been duped! I found out that SlimWhitman is neither slim, nor Swiss. He's not the shadowy manatee-loving fellow we all thought. His real name is Mario & lives

Environmental concerned Hindus decided rather than worshipping the smelly cow they would worship the kangaroo. The kangaroo ate grass all day but does not fart. Greenhouse gases

In the ever-so-late Spring of 2013, the people of Earth finally had some kind of shambly Sanghah or however it's spelled, but the crusty Arcturians would have none of it. Despite

Just as Alexander the Macedone wept salt tears when he had no more worlds to conquer, so Lex McBride lifted his bloodied face to the Vegas crowd and swore to quit boxing forever.

"Excuse me, but..." she leaned in closer to me and whispered. "You didn't give me the letters." I had absolutely no idea what this woman on Bus 87 was talking about. She looked

If recent history is a decent indicator, my day will probably go something like this: Wake up to kids fighting. Yell at them until they eat their cereal. Drive older boy to school,

Beneath the dense city air lay Hunstanton Pier. At first glance she is ugly, spoiling the consistency of the artificial green grass. You have to look closely to see her true beauty

My creative meditation class took a turn to the unnerving the other day. We were planing off the coast of the ancient moon lake when I was jolted awake. Everyone was still in state

Roger Ebert looked at the woman across the bar, Annette Fonicello. He raised his glass in a toast. She smiled. Then Margaret Thatcher arrived, "Am I interrupting?"

The woman walked down the aisle holding her daughter's hand. The woman said wearily "We are not buying food for imaginary people".

"Soooo, how many grandmothers DO you have?" I asked my student who didn't turn his paper in on time (again). "And how many of them are still alive?"

The thing about Laverne was that she had tavern battered breasts that

In a prologue set years earlier when some sort of weather typical for the setting was to be expected, a domestic animal woke an incidental character in the usual way. This presaged