these pretzels are making me thirsty!

Look again at the Maltese vertigo near the keypoint. Subservient feelings will attempt a cover up, but you must not give way. Look and see them, on the canyon cliffs, bleeding on

Don't piss old St. Nick off this year let me tell ya! The North Pole is not immune to a recession! I heard that if you're on the "naughty" list this year that he's going to

The books fell from the shelf and onto her head, but they were paperbacks. This was the second quake in five minutes. The first had caused her parents to fall from the balcony.

The drug cartel has shot up like a weed. Grown beyond his wildest dreams. They were now the government of Mexico, calling the shots. He finally could make

They had been living in IKEA for 6 mos. now. They ate .99 cent Swedish meatballs everyday and lounged in the model front rooms. When they got sick of a decor, they just walked to

"Let the dice fall where they may" he said. "But these are dice made from the bezoar we dug from your stomach last month". "It didn't kill me then and it won't --" he started

The scent of pine covered his fingers and reminded him it was Christmas time when he leaned a cheek against his fist. Only two days left, but five before Christmas. He would never

No, no, Bruce. Not Butt Pirates. But pirates. They are grammar terrorists.

He was definitely never drinking melon liquor ever again. The number of heaves wasn't important until after the 50th or so, but the color was. They were meant to be green, but

"If I wanted a lemur I would have asked for a lemur..." he exploded, exasperated. The young girl took a step back from the counter. "Oh alright, you said he could be fitted with

She had done it! After all the long years of studying it was finally going to pay off she thought as she applied her lipstick and rolled the hot rollers into her hair. Now, she

"The Commisar's in town," someone whispered. Don't turn around he thought. Just keep pushing this wheel barrel full of Mighty Putty to the bus stop. If he can was it up

50, 60 , 70, 80 and slam into fifth gear. Wind smacked him in the face, including a sea gull which bounced off his helmet. He angled higher, and then gritted his dentures. Now

"Do the truffle-shuffle!" we pleaded. However, all of our efforts in convincing Nathan his 7th grade picture made him look like Chunk from the Goonies were in vain.

I am awesome

In the offices of the Allen County Highway Department, Construction Manager Michelle Schmidt was sitting at her desk looking at site photos and engineering schematics and various

I see her all time online, but don;t know when we'll meet. We vChat all day but its confusing. Should we commit or not commit. It's hard to make decisions...

A group of about 50 religious protesters marched around the circle for about two hours at the beginning of the celebration carrying signs that said,

Globalization is not an even process, but occurs on many levels simultaneously and with different levels of