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  • 2 buckle my shoe. 3 4 up the score.
  • 5 6 pick up chicks. 7 8 lay them straight. 9 10 A BIG FAT HEN! That was the note the Chickenhawk Killer left with each of his victims. That and a dead chicken. Cooperstown wasn't
  • prepared for the Chickenhawk serial killer. The town was illiterate & couldn't read the notes on the victims, but Velma, waitress at Crapittos Diner, swore she knew the handwriting
  • from somewhere. She eventually discovered it was her brother's, but her brother had been dead for years! The ChickenHawk serial killer stepped out as Velma approached the table.
  • Velma kept her eyes on the weird clock. Something told her that if she pretended to be focused on something else, the evil danger would pass over her. The ChickenHawk serial killer
  • suicided then. But he reincarnated as The Big Lebowski, spreading wisdom from the world
  • and healing the harmed. After all, he WAS The Big Lebowski, and he was now on a mission because of his suicide. But he was reincarnated now. His next mission was to
  • abide. He would always abide. The Big Lebowski was
  • the only movie he'd ever seen. Perhaps basing one's morality on a moving picture created for mass consumption seems trite, but many raised in well-meaning homes had done worse.

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