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Someone once told him he looked like Haggar

  • Someone once told him he looked like Haggar and one day he looked into a window at Bloomingdale's and he saw himself- he really saw himself apparently for the first time...
  • He was rude, overweight, violence prone, 4 colors & quite literally 2-dimensional. Simon turned sideways & his reflection in the window disappeared. But he resolved to change all
  • that some day in the future. He didn't want to be rude or fat, but damn, that was a lot to change. Tomorrow he thought. Simon was also two-dimensional which meant that
  • he only had length & width, but no depth. Like a piece of paper, ignoring the fact that a piece of paper does actually have depth, just not very much. So Simon had less depth than
  • that. In fact he was so thin you could see through him like tracing paper. That's how he got a job as an anatomy chart at the Mayo clinic. They used him for instructing interns &
  • getting coffee & shit like that. I've seen those doctors beat his ass with their Stethoscopes like something straight outta' Rambo. I'm sayin' this kid was SKINNY. I said to him
  • "Hey, Skinny." And he was like, "Hey" And I was like, "Skinny jeans?" And he was like, "Yeah" Then he paid for his Starbucks and I never saw him again. Well, boing storytime is ove
  • r." Marsha glared at me over her latte moustache. "And you just let Mister Skinny Jeans go?" I looked away. I preferred the desert of loneliness. And guys with leg muscles. My fr
  • ying pan had more sizzle in it than my love life.True, I liked muscular men, but in order for me to attract them, I had to bulk up myself. Man-o-Man Gym was the place I finally met
  • some vain, self-important alpha male who would only reciprocate for my body until something fresher came along, and he pulled the "I can only love women" card on me months after.
Started
2012-05-02 20:53:13
Finished
2012-11-10 00:25:22

3 Comments

  1. Avatar

    BlastedHeath Nov 15 2012 @ 19:53

    For a moment I thought Leslie Nielsen had paid us a visit, and then there was jaw2ek's awesome fold. This one really had me laughing.
  2. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Nov 16 2012 @ 04:38

    Yeah, the patient more-or-less died and Jaw reanimated. Very funny. The other Nielsen: http://foldingstory.com/wov72/
  3. Avatar

    jaw2ek Nov 16 2012 @ 10:38

    One of the great things about FS is random accidents. I had NO IDEA what was going on with the fold I was working with. Just trying to latch on to something.

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