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"Don't try this at home," he thought as he

  • "Don't try this at home," he thought as he stuffed her corpse full of dynamite. He thought of having the fuse come out her vagina or ass, but that was too obvious. No, he would
  • use the ol' nipple ignition switch technique his mom taught him back in the 8th grade. At the time, he resented her for stealing his childhood. But these days, he knew better as
  • every one night stand ended the same way at precisely 3:34 am. He crept in with a pan of ice cold water and laid it on a pillow just above her head. Then he grabbed her nipples and
  • began milking the cow as if his life depended on it -- because it did. The mobster holding the gun to the farmer's head wanted
  • egg nog, and he wanted it NOW!
  • But time was against them all, and deep down he knew it always would be. "Revel in the simplest pleasures", he thought as he pulled out the brandy.
  • He reached for the glass and had second thoughts. No need for formalities, he thought, and then chugged right from the top of the bottle. She gasped at the sight. He just laughed.
  • "You think you're better than everyone else, don't you, Ellse?" She gave him a disdainful look. "Of course not. But you've just destroyed the evidence." She pointed to the bottle.
  • Gripping the bottle by its neck, he smashed it against the ground & swung at Ellse with the freshly jagged end. She recoiled, but the crude weapon nicked her
  • pristine beehive hairdo. Ellse glared at him. "I was at the salon for 2 hours today!" He opened his mouth for a punny retort, but since he wasn't OldestLiving, he was speechless.
Started
2010-12-08 12:42:23
Finished
2011-01-06 02:04:34

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