Have your heard of Mr. Tomato? He's a shiny

  • Have your heard of Mr. Tomato? He's a shiny samba loving fruity fellow. He was initially green with envy at Mr. Potato Heads greater fame, but he's ripened with age and has his own
  • action figure nowadays!" Wow, tell us more grandpa, tell us about Mr. Tomato!" cried the little children."Ho ho, well, you see, Mr. Tomato is a very mysterious fellow, he was born
  • in the Garden of Eden, destined to be the favored fruit of humankind.Round and juicy was Mr. Tomato, but prone to causing acid reflux when not consumed with carbohydrates.Thus, the
  • people invented Gaviscon, Mr. Tomato's nemesis. One day Mr.Tomato partnered with Mr. Sugar and Mr. Vinegar and formed The Ketchup Alliance sponsored by Mr. Heinz. Mr Tomato became
  • a powerful man in the League of Sauces. The Ketchup Alliance was fighting in Somalia when the rebels released mustard gas. Mr Tomato turned to conciliation to resolve the feud
  • But there was a Mayonnaise Cell that didn't want resolution. They wanted to spread panic so they bottled up Mr. Tomato. The Ketchup Alliance had real trouble trying to shake
  • him out of there and it wasn't long before the Ketchup Alliance and Mr. Tomato had a argument and they broke their tenuous alliance. The break up was quiet timely as it allowed for
  • The organic tomato growers to grab market share, making john mackie of whole foods one happy man. He tweeted about this and the former allies sought revenge. This was equivalent
  • being somebody else's Lifeline. You never wanted to throw yourself that far. And in the ocean. Where to start in on that one one? Still it was nice that they thought of you. Gives
  • you a nice feeling, knowing that they haven't forgotten you even if you are all wadded up and tied to a boat. It could be worse. Maybe.


  1. SlimWhitman Jan 07 2017 @ 13:01

    Wow! Mr. Tomato lasted 'til line 7! I wonder what Mr. Tomato is up to these days?

  2. Dhanithecat Jan 07 2017 @ 13:19

    Here comes the sequel.

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