49

"One man's junk is another man's pacifier,"

  • "One man's junk is another man's pacifier,"
  • I find antiques sooth me. I can spend hours browsing old license plates, oil cans, and Hummel figurines. I particularly like to lick the paint.
  • of old toy soldiers. So piquant--the taste of lead on my tongue. It reminds me of the tang of strychnine & ammonia in gin.A heady mix for an immortal, & quite the party trick too.
  • Being undead means winning every party dare. I swallowed the lead figurine. "Now I have roman plumbing" I joked. They laughed nervously. Let's play monster roulette" said Wolfman
  • Jack, voice as raucous as it was when he was alive. Despite groans, Jack spun a knucklebone, probably belonging to some missionary on the wheel. The nameless mummy reached out to
  • the corpse of Brett Somers. Gene Rayburn's reanimated body read the clue, as follows: "Dumb Dora was so dumb..." (silence from the dead audience) she put BLANK in her coffin." Eeri
  • ly, a very young Betty White, dressed in a red string bikini, appeared and snarkily replied, "Strawberry lubricant and a whip." The corpse of Brett Somers shouted, "That's my line
  • cowboy, why don't you try that line up in Brixton's pubs with the Sailorboys. I hear they need a new bottom." The corpse of Brett Somers had a point. Betty White looked hot. Latex
  • ass-less chaps hugging her every curve, she walked through the western-style half doors with a flourish, hands on her side arms. "Gentlemen." She tipped the brim of her hat. "What
  • do you think of my ass? " She turned to show them, but...nothing. "Ma'am, I am sorry to tell you, but...YOU ARE ONLY A TORSO!"
Started
2015-01-03 22:05:04
Finished
2018-07-08 00:03:44

2 Comments

  1. Avatar

    BlastedHeath Jul 08 2018 @ 15:48

    The end without an end.
  2. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Jul 08 2018 @ 16:22

    LOL. What a logical finish to an undead party story.

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