If Cookie Monster can indulge in 50 cookies
- If Cookie Monster can indulge in 50 cookies before lunch, it must certainly be acceptable for me to devour 10 margaritas for breakfast after the night I've had! I can't believe
- how easily I used my daughter's television show characters to justify my own self-destructive alcohol addiction. If Dora can spend her life taking fantasy trips then why can't
- I take a few little "trips" out of a bottle here and there? If Xavier can indulge in supermodel-groping in pursuit of some egotistical high, then surely I'm justified
- in my innocent fascination with the discarded detritus of the famous. I share my collection with no one, and speak about it not. But I dream. I dream of my grail. She
- is the discarded tissues of Lady Gaga. To have her kleenex indexed in mylar bags would be heaven. Her trash is protected by armed guards, so I must be careful. I bring a grapple.
- Yes, Lady Gaga's trash would be protected, because how else will she get her new costumes and makeup? Only I, her best stalker, has attained proof of her manhood. Cult of celebrity
- watching, knowing her every move and step always helped in the stalking. Never staying in one spot. Lady GaGa had no idea what I now knew about her
- but she was about to find out! Hiding in Lady Gaga' s dressing room closet, I giggled insanely & waited for her to arrive. Mmmphf! Wait'll she opens the door & finds me
- ...she might cover herself in glue and roll around in me. I don't want to be Lady Gaga's next accessory. There has to be a way to escape from her dressing room closet.
- Just then, the door burst open; she looked me dead in the eye, holding a roll of cling wrap and a jar of jelly. Game over.
- Started
- 2011-08-20 13:38:11
- Finished
- 2013-04-13 11:34:52
1 Comments
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Zetawilk Apr 13 2013 @ 12:57
Moral of the story: Celebrities LARP for a living, then throw all our money for "charities" where the sun won't shine. Then they proselytize to us. Show them no pity.