53

The Hippie-ish Hick swallowed his pisswater

  • The Hippie-ish Hick swallowed his pisswater beer and smiled, "Life is a flat circle."
  • So I took out my circular saw and let the hippie hick have it.
  • The hippie hick said, "Thanks I need one of these!" Just kidding. He screamed & blood sprayed everywhere as I hacked him to bits. I put away my circular saw & straightened my tie.
  • That's when I saw a glinting object buried in the ex-hippy's beard. I extricated it & held it in the palm of my hand. After several beeps it levitated, hovered and moved towards
  • me. You don't expect to find a UFO in a hippy's beard but there you go. Tiny ET's in a space ship that had been reduced in size. Any earth invasion would be hard to detect..
  • And this is why I can't trust hippies, especially hippies with beards. They might be hiding a UFO in there, and then that would be the end of us all.
  • Imagine: a faint buzzing, coming from the greasy, marijuana-scented facial hair. Next, a flashing green light. The beard hair parts and the UFO whizzes out, firing lazers at you.
  • It fired upon its previous house, this Ship attacked with all of its lazers! It was on a mission to end the world, but it was tiny, oh so very tiny.
  • The laser savagely vaporised a pea-sized portion of one of the house's bricks, creating a tiny plume of smoke. Satisfied with its prowess, the ship moved in for the kill.
  • Unfortunately, it miscalculated its size and speed and crashed into the house, killing everyone aboard. The family dog was overjoyed to see it there on the lawn, and swallowed it.
Started
2014-08-10 12:17:16
Finished
2018-04-23 13:07:03

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Woab Apr 23 2018 @ 17:17

    Ooh, I love the idea of UFOs in hippie beards. Shall we expound?

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!