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"Push the button and someone will die. In

  • "Push the button and someone will die. In the same time, you will receive one million dollars" - said the note. Jason looked at the content of the box he found at the door. Indeed,
  • he wanted very badly to press that tempting red button. There were seven billion people in the world, what harm would killing one person for a million dollars do? Would they hunt h
  • -im? Not if he went on the offensive. He mashed the million-dollar murder button until it killed his hunters, and $7 quadrillion appeared in his pockets. Hooray for big cargo pants
  • . His had hidden pockets, too, so there were layers upon layers of pockets where he stashed his cash. His cargo pants sagged so much that he couldn't run anymore.
  • He kept his most sacred valuables twixt his butt cheeks, which were dangerously exposed due to his overloaded cargo pants. That's when it happened: someone heisted his
  • family jewels! In a daring display of gypsy thievery, his 2 priceless orbs were stolen right out of his pants! He felt all over, looked around on the ground, but no, they were gone
  • the priceless orbs of the family jewels were taken by a witch who'd cast a spell over him. She'd used the words of naggary which had leeched the man's strength until he could no lo
  • nger use his manpower to leave the toilet's seat up anymore. His mashismo was kaput, his virile walk stolen. He had to get the family jewels back, or all would be lost. The witch
  • was using them to grow hair on the walls of her filthy hovel when he pranced in with mincing steps. "Miss Witch, may I have my family jewels back please?" he asked hesitantly.
  • "You know that's not possible," the Witch responded. "I traded them to the neighbours for cheese slices to place on their altar. Now run along before

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